Occasionally, I am overcome with a sense of shock and awe that my children are actually, really, truly growing up. Remember learning how to ride a bike? Unsteady. Wobbling. Falling. Skinned knees. Dad holding the bike, running beside. The bike is balanced. Dad has let go. Unaware. Pedaling. Until, all at once, you realize that YOU ARE DOING IT!

That is the feeling.

Standing in the kitchen, making dinner, I turn to my son and truly absorb that I am LOOKING UP at my broad chested teenage son. In an instant, I have gone from talking to my little boy, to meeting the young man he has become.

Just as a sunset, streaking the horizon, flaming orange and pink over a glistening ocean, can take my breath away; so too can the sight of my daughter leaning on her boyfriend’s shoulder, and the sound of my eight year old reading the word “magnificent” without pause. These simple things squeeze my heart, and flip my stomach. These moments, a speed bump in a life I am hurtling through at full speed. My car catches air. My foot comes off the gas. I am out of control and totally exhilarated.

I smile as the sensation overwhelms me…

WOW! I’m the adult in charge of these four amazing kids. OMG, I think I am doing it. I think I am actually a responsible adult raising some pretty fantastic children. And check it out; that guy with the hot ass sitting three pews ahead of me 18 years ago; he and I are making this marriage thing work pretty well. Plus, he still has a freaking hot ass. “Look MOM!! No hands!”

Seconds later, I’m on the ground again; wheel securely gripped; focus on the road ahead…

Life bundles the mundane and miraculous together like a load of brightly colored clothes spinning in a dryer. And, just as if I were in a laundromat, I barely notice. I SEE the tangle of colors, but my brain does not process anything remarkable. Why? I quite simply DO NOT HAVE TIME TO SIT IN THE LAUNDROMAT DAYDREAMING ABOUT THE BEAUTY OF MY ALMOST DRY CLOTHES. Because…

Mom! I’m hungry!”
I feel like I’m forgetting something…
Mom, there is no ink and I HAVE to print this report TODAY!”
For the love of Peter I was just at Target.
MOM! Do you know where my cleats are?”
Was that breaking glass?
Mom! Starving over here!”
Oh for all things holy!                          Do I hear crying?
OMG! How does one forget to pick up their kid from tutoring? Mother of the freaking year!
I’ll get wine while I’m out. I seriously need wine.
Mom, are you going to get printer ink?”
The phone, where is my damn phone? “Has anyone seen my phone?”
Mom! The cat threw up on my bed!”
Keys, where did I put my keys?
Mom, I made this for you today at school.”

SPEEDBUMP…. Embrace life’s moments of awakening. They are truly a gift from God.


Don’t Blink, Kenny Chesney